Top nine reasons my life is enhanced nine years later…

9. I now have more patience than I’ve ever thought myself capable.

8. I have two beautiful daughters of my very own.

7. My “what if” ways have blossomed into “then we’ll just” ways

6. I feel “complete”.  I’ve got my perfect family.  Loving husband?  Check.  Terrific kids?  Check.  Sweet dog?  Check.  Mortgage?  CHEEEEAAACK.

5. I have never felt more beautiful.  (Though my exterior may disagree, I certainly feel more beautiful on the INSIDE.)

4. My wits have never been sharper.  (They’re a must for survival around these parts.)

3. There is never a dull moment in my life.

2. I feel secure.

1. I get to do some pretty awesome stuff with a pretty awesome companion.  Vegas, here we come, Baby!

Happy 9^th Anniversary, honey!  Marrying you was one of the best decisions of my life.

wedding day 7-17-99

Is it sad that a picture from last summer is the most recent one of us I could find???

See you all in a week~

“Wordless” Wednesday

Aunt Heather lending a helping hand

Which one's yours again?

waiting patiently

snip!

proud parade

Summertime is grand

Slip and Slide, sprinkler, the pool,

bikes, and sidewalk chalk

Fireworks, ice cream,

lingering walks to the park,

catching lightning bugs

Fresh watermelon,

lemonade, cook-outs, iced tea

twilight basketball

Flowers in full bloom,

planning vacations (woo hooo!)

softball, soccer, sun

Corn on the cob (yum)

Popsicles, bratwursts, lawn chairs

scent of fresh-cut lawns

There is a flip side…

“Mommy, can we go outside???”

patience, dear kiddies

House won’t clean itself

dishes begin to pile up

beds remain unmade

But, the pool, the POOL!

Hang on, Mommy’s reading blogs

Almost done!  Hang on!

Mommy, can we PLEASE

set up the slip and slide now???

it will be SO fun!

Time to go yet, Mom?

Ready for that bike ride NOW?

Let’s go, hurry UP!

Can we do this?  Can

we do that?  What about this?

Oooo, ooo, OOOO and THAT!

Bedtime is postponed

It’s much too light for sleeping

(Where’d I put that wine?)

Summer, I do love

all you have to offer us

you just wear me out

Wheee!

twilight basketball

lightning bug family

testing the waters

EeEeEeK!

Worldess Wednesday

 (except for captions - sorry, couldn’t resist)

Waiting for fireworks

Glowstick angel

fuzzy fireworks

slip n slide

scoot n splash

screeeeech!

Whoopsie!

unwelcome guest

I know so many of you out there are getting excited - preparing for a little conference coming up.

I am not one of those people.

It’s all good, though.  (Even if I am a bit sad that I missed out on that sweet bandwagon.  Next year, perhaps?)

On the day that you all are heading to San Fran, I will be heading to Sin City! 

Yep.  Hubby and I will be celebrating our 9th wedding anniversary in Vegas, baby!

Woo hoo!
But, shhhh.  I’ve got a bit of a confession.

I’m a Vegas virgin.  Whew!  I feel better now.

Have any of you been?

We’ve been making some trips to the bookstore for books with tips.  Since we’re newbies.

We’ve been buying/renting all  Vegas-related movies.  To get us in the mood.

We’ve studied the online maps, and even bought a new road atlas.  To help us not get lost in the desert on one of our excursions.

Now, I’m not trying to sound cliche’, but honestly???  What WILL I wear?

I have been shopping more than usual.  (Read:  I have been shopping.  Period.  Something I don’t usually do for MYSELF.) 

But, the things I’ve purchased have been mostly business casual (with an emPHASis on casual).  It’s what I’m comfortable in.  (And what I will continue to wear once this little rendezvous is over with.)

My main concern is this.  Every movie or book that we’ve seen about Las Vegas showcases people dressed to the nines.  Is this the norm?  Is it expected?  Or is it just a show? 

Something to make Las Vegas look all glamorous when really it’s just a vacation place where grownups go to play?  And dress up if they are going someplace truly fancy?  Like a show or to a fancy restaurant?

Please inform me, Vegas veterans.

Because I did buy a fancy dress.  It’s really fancy.  I even bought some jewelry and beautiful shoes to match.  But, I wasn’t planning on wearing that the WHOLE time. 

Will we be kicked out of the joint for dressing down?  I really do want to know.  My husband is hoping that it’s not true.  He is truly scared of the prospect of having to don a suit and tie every day of our vacation, and is seriously starting to regret our decision to go there.

Keep in mind that we are planning on doing a lot of sight seeing, not a whole lot of gambling.  What is the dress code for just hanging out at the hotel?  At the casino?  When visiting other hotel/casinos?

Thanks in advance for your help!

And I look forward to coming back from our vacation and hearing all about yours. 

Andi from Poot and Cubby said it best when she said,  ”What do I do when I have nothing to say?  I exploit my children for gain because that’s what Mommy Bloggers do.”

Truer words were never spoken.

So, in true Mommy-Mandy form, I’m taking these quotes from my 4 year old’s mouth (and from the various Post-Its cluttering up my desk).

Daddy: “Kae, you look so glamorous today!”  ~commenting on her outfit consisting of a straw hat, painted fingernails AND toenails, a tinkerbell purse, (fingerprinted-to-the-point-of-opaqueness) dinosaur sunglasses, and a pink sundress with matching blue flip flops.  She was styling. 

Kae: words dripping with attitude ~ “Daddy!  I’m not glamorous, because I don’t have a scarf! - *heavy sigh*”

Kae: after seeing the commercial for the 40 bajillionth time ~ “Mommy, when WILL we get those FIREWORKS, FIREWORKS, FIREWORKS?”

Kae: calling from the bathroom ~ “Moooom!  I need some help in here!  I had another one of those slobbery poops!”

Don’t lie.  You know EXACTLY what she’s talking about.

NOT!

In reality, we saw an exact 1/3 replica of the Eiffel Tower at Paramount Kings Island this past weekend.

WOOT!  Mini vac!

We had lovely weather (sans one rainstorm that really didn’t affect us in any way, shape or form.  Yay, inside rides!)

We enjoyed each other’s company - ALONE.  Which next to never happens.

We got to ride BIG PEOPLE rides.  By ourselves.  We’re brave.

We slept an ENTIRE night (in a KING sized bed - oo OOO!) without tiny limbs climbing in of their own accord, and stealing covers.

When can I go back?

“Wordless” Wednesday

(lilies Hubby bought for me 3 years ago, before we moved ~ they’ve done well for themselves)

As I am writing this, I am literally counting my breaths.

I am calming myself as I feel my heart beating wildly in my chest. 

If someone were to look at me right now, they’d probably see smoke whistling from my ears.

Because, I am spitting mad.

At my daughter.  At myself.  At my handling of the situation.

The situation:

Noelle (after some major issues with testing my patience today) yelled to me, “WHY DON’T YOU TRY AND MAKE ME?!”

In our driveway.

For everyone in the entire neighborhood to hear.  In response to me calling her back in the house.

Oh yes she did.

I about flipped my lid.

As mentioned above, she has been testing and pushing my buttons all day. (A pretty common theme around here.)

This time?  Not sure why.  Maybe something to do with Mommy and Daddy having a wee bit of a vacation this past weekend? 

Who knows?  And you know what?  Who cares?  All I know is that right there? THAT wasn’t going to fly with me.

I marched her little behind in the house promptly, and escorted her up to her room.

In the midst of all this drama, I heard myself shouting.  I felt my blood pressure rising.  I could literally feel myself turning red with anger.

How dare she?

Why would she think that was OK? 

Why, why, why, why, WHY???

Before I was a Mom, I thought that parenting would be a breeze.

I was the oldest in our family.  (5 years older than my sister, and 11 years older than my brother.)

I had many younger cousins whom I saw often, and was often a caregiver to them.

I babysat VERY often for other folks in our small town.

Then, I became a teacher.  I had MANY students in my care. 

It was a breeze!  I was competent.  I was in charge.  I was capable.

And I always thought to myself, “I’m going to make a great Mom someday.” 

I would even go so far as to judge others for their parenting skills, or lack thereof.

As if I had a clue.

Now I AM a Mom.  And, I feel as if every day I suck at it a little more.

I don’t always feel as if I’m “in charge”.  I don’t always feel as if I’ve got it all together, or even that I’m hanging on by a thread.  Sometimes I feel as if I’ve completely tripped and fallen off a huge cliff, and I’ve got no spare branches or ledges to grab hold of. 

I try to maintain my balance, but somehow I find myself teetering on that edge of insanity.  Of not knowing what the hell I’m doing, or how to make things right.

How could I raise a daughter that says that to me?  Or even acts the way she does half the time?  I certainly never acted that way growing up.  I was the shy one.

Where did I go wrong?

What happened to my “in control” self?  What happened to my confidence?

Because now?  I feel like I know next to nothing about this parenting gig. 

I find myself questioning my parenting skills every. single. day when I have power struggle after power struggle with Noelle. 

She wears me out with her stubborn-ness and with her (what seem to me) negative pleas for attention.

I just feel inadequate.

I’m probably breaking some Mommy code by saying this, but my younger daughter is the one who renews my bruised ego.  Always eager for hugs and sweetness, she makes me see that I’m not a complete screw up.

I honestly don’t want to have these feelings.  The ones where I wish Noelle would just cooperate for once, and be more like her younger sister.

The ones where I feel resentful and hateful and helpless.

These are the things that you THINK you know about, but you have no idea. 

Not until you live it.  Breathe it.  Handle it.

Or try to.

But fail.

The deep breaths have subsided.

The heart rate is slowed.

We’ve had our talk. 

We’ve hugged it out.

We’ve promised to try better next time.

But I know that I’ll be right back here again soon. 

Because inevitably, I always am.

Can we go swimming?

It’s so hot today, Mommy!

Grandma’s pool sounds good.

Nicer than our pool.

Fewer people, anyway.

Warmer water, too.

Yay!  All to ourselves!

Free to jump, splash, float and play.

Grandma, watch this trick!

No need for floaties.

(True, at least for the oldest.)

Showing off is fun.

Cannonball! is yelled

Jump!  Sploosh!  Oops! Lost my goggles!

Dad, can you help me?

Time to get out now!

Warm, fluffy towels await.

Can’t wait ’till next time!